Why The Shroud of Turin Still Cannot Possibly Belong to Jesus

photonegatives comparing the Shroud to a recreation

The Shroud of Turing came back into the news recently, after a scientific study used a new method to examine the fibers, and concluded the fabric of the shroud was consistent with fabric from the 1st century.  And then someone asked a generative AI to recreate the face of the subject of the Shroud, and the generative AI generated something, and now that makes people excited, too.

Over a decade ago, I wrote a blog post about how it is impossible for the Shroud of Turin to be the actual burial Shroud of Jesus.  I know this because, the eyewitness testimony from the Apostles recorded in the Bible describe Jesus as being wrapped up in numerous bandage-like cloths, including a separate cloth for his face.  This was the consistent Jewish custom at this time, too.  Whereas the Shroud of Turin is just a big long blanket that was laid over back-to-front on its subject.  I'll leave the analysis there as basically complete.

But I'll say part of it again.  Science could prove that the Shroud of Turin absolutely originates not only from the 1st century, but from the exact town of Arimathea in the exact year AD 33, and from no other possible time or place.  Science could not only fail to reproduce the Shroud's image, but in fact prove that the Shroud could only be produced by a continual miracle.  It would just mean that the Shroud of Turin is a miraculous image of some random person who is not Jesus.

We would have to still conclude it doesn't belong to Jesus, because we still know that Jesus was buried in a way inconsistent with the Shroud of Turin.

However, it isn't the case that science has shown beyond all doubt that the Shroud is authentic or irreproducible.

The recent scientific study showed the Shroud could be consistent with the 1st century, but in a window inconsistent with the death of Jesus.

As for previous evidence.  There is no record of the Shroud of Turin anywhere, until the 14th century, when the Shroud suddenly appears.  The man who made it was soon apprehended by church authorities, and confessed to the crime.  The radiocarbon dating of the Shroud puts it in exactly this same century of its first appearance.  The method of creating the Shroud has been reproduced, and requires draping a blanket over either a human subject or a bas-relief sculpture, then applying with a brush either an acid treatment or a strain.  This reproduces the most striking properties of the Shroud's image: its photo-negative effect, and its three-dimensional information, and leaves an image similar in appearance to the original.  For the case of the Shroud, a sculpture and not a human subject was used.  We can infer this, because the anatomy of the Shroud's subject is disproportioned.  As an example, the arms which are crossed over the genitals for modesty; they are too long, and one is longer than the other.  Also, the two sides of the Shroud do not match in measurements, as they must if a human subject were used.  The sculpture used for the Shroud was much more elaborate than that used in modern recreations, but in terms of technique it is fully reproducible with rudimentary technology.

It's worth pointing out, because I think people read too much into modern analysis: the person who first forged the Shroud had no interest in creating an image that would be a photonegative, or contain 3D information.  He certainly had no interest in recreating the exact depth of the markings on the fiber cells.  No one knew the Shroud had these properties for at least the first 700 years of its existence.  The forger's only interest was in creating the primary image (the one visible to the eye), that looks like it might resemble how Jesus looked in popular gothic piety at the time.  So when it comes to explaining how the forger did it, from the forger's point of view any method producing the primary image without leaving paint residue would be acceptable.  Therefore, any explanation that can account for the primary image is sufficient.

There are many methods of creating the primary image, without using obviously-detectable paints or dyes.

As it happens, we know of several ways of creating the primary image, which also recreate the photonegative effect and capture the 3D information.

Let's take a minute to think about why so many people claim the Shroud cannot be explained or reproduced with modern science and instead must be both authentic and a miracle.

The argument I am often given for why the Shroud of Turin must be legitimate, is that it has so many miraculous properties that it could only be explained by being in contact with the corpse of Jesus during the moment of Resurrection.  Because it requires a miracle to make it, we know it must be the burial shroud of Jesus.

The Shroud is then used as a proof of Jesus' bodily Resurrection.  The Resurrection must have happened, because look at this miraculous impact it had on Jesus' burial cloth.

But how are we so sure this is Jesus' burial cloth, again?  We're using the miraculousness of the Resurrection to prove this is Jesus' burial cloth, but then the idea that this is Jesus' burial cloth to prove the Resurrection.

The Shroud might very well be miraculous.  It's not, but we can grant it might be.  Being merely miraculous doesn't require that it has any connection to Jesus.

If we had some other reason to suspect the Shroud of Turin to belong to Jesus, then the argument would work better.  But we don't have any such reason.  The Shroud's history begins in the late medieval period, where it suddenly appears and its forger soon arrested after a confession.  The groups claiming the Shroud is authentic, are the same groups who purport far more laughable alleged images to be authentic.  Such as the Holy Face of Genoa or the Veil of Veronica, which look exactly like medieval fakes, and look that way because they are medieval fakes, and yet are displayed and revered as though authentic acheiropoieta.  

The Face of Genoa.  People have believed this was made "without human hands," and the artist wasn't even trying.  

The Shroud of Turin is in this same line.  Its primary image looks like a medieval forgery, and it looks that way because it is.

But once again, the situation could change.  Science could prove that all of the modern recreations actually used miracles too (and didn't tell anyone), and that part of the miracle of the Shroud of Turin is its preservation from all history until the late medieval period, and having miraculously more carbon-14 in its fibers than it should have.  It's still not authentic, because it contradicts what the Bible says, and contradicts what the Apostles said, and contradicts what the eyewitness records of the events recorded.

Christians: think more critically about this kind of thing.  Especially regarding an area like medieval relics, which is so rife with obvious fraud.  We can do better than this.

Wizards of the Coast Do Not Understand the OGL

It was recently announced that Cynthia Williams, CEO of Wizards of the Coast, the company which controls the Dungeons and Dragons brand, will be resigning.  Wherever else she goes on to, within the D&D hobby, Cynthia Williams will forevermore be known as the woman who oversaw the OGL scandal and completely tanked all brand trust for the official D&D brand.  I originally wrote this last year in January, during the height of the OGL fiasco.   Before I could publish it, WOTC completely folded to public pressure and released the entire SRD 5.1 under a CC-BY license.  Despite the last-minute act to salvage public good will, the OGL scandal continues to plague WOTC and D&D.  With the recent announcement that Cynthia Williams will be leaving, I thought it worthwhile to revisit the OGL fiasco.

*****

My last post was a very long break-down of the OGL situation, describing how the OGL works, its purpose, the nature of what Wizards of the Coast (WOTC) are doing, and what I hope would happen.

Since writing that, more news in the area has occurred, including the draft OGL 1.2.

What is clear to me, is that many people, including WOTC, do not understand even what the OGL is in the first place.  So in this post I just want to clarify in as brief a way I can how the OGL works, how it does not work, and why this is a big deal.

This is going to be a very in-depth look at the legal wording of both the original OGL 1.0, and the proposed OGL 1.2.  My thesis in this is, that WOTC do not understand the OGL 1.0, do not know what it is, and have been misconstruing it (deliberately or not) in order to push forward with their plans.

D&D is Not the Forgotten Realms

I recently watched the D&D movie, despite having sworn never to see it.  And it's actually a pretty decent movie.  It's got some good laughs and an interesting story.  It entertained me, and so fulfilled its only purpose.

from the original 1980s D&D cartoon

If you knew nothing about D&D, you might still know it's a game that nerds play on a table with pens, paper, dice, tiny statues, and tons and tons of rulebooks.  So you might wonder how a game with pens, paper, dice, statues, and rulebooks could be turned into a movie.  And if you think about it, you might come up with a few obvious ways to do this.

The most obvious is a fantasy-themed Jumanji.  Some kids start playing D&D and get sucked into their own game world and have to battle skeletons and dragons with swords and spells.  There was an early 1980s Saturday morning cartoon based on that premise.  But that isn't what the movie is about.

Another might be something like a dice-rolling Scott Pilgrim, where the characters are governed by the rules of the game world.  They roll dice when they attempt feats, either literally rolling one or the screen displaying a die above each character's head.  When they swing a sword, damage and HP meters show up, then experience points tick up.  There are several popular web comics built on this premise.  But that also isn't what the movie is about.

Lagfoot Browne

[I originally wrote this as a teenager, as a creative writing assignment in the style of Edgar Allen Poe.  I came across the image below in the thumbnail, which was part of the original inspiration, and decided to post it in time for Halloween.  My teenage self loved purple prose.  I pared the language down to make it legible, while trying to remain true to the original assignment.  Except the phrasing, this is as I wrote it twenty years ago.]

*****

Even from my youth, I had always been plagued by migraines.  The pain built behind my eyes, incapacitating me for hours.  Often it became so unbearable I would vomit.  Light or sound were excruciating.  I had found it best to lock myself alone in my chambers, enclosed in darkness, until the fits subsided.  

Within those dark times, I would often find myself confronted by frightful and fevered visions.  No matter my shouting, the befuddled nurses who attended me always failed to perceive these visions.  The visions varied often, and all so real I aver I could have reached out my hand to touch them, but the vision which most impressed upon me the reality of its presence, is also the one which most often recurred.  I came to know this vision most, and feared its reappearance, however inevitable.  It was, as far as my pain-anguished eyes let me see, a small imp, its skin a blotted red and brown, with eyes that held the very chaos of Hell inside.  It would dance through my bedchamber and with horrid claws shred my books, humming all the while.  The tune was unfamiliar, and yet a constant, and over the years I learnt it well.  

Positions I Don't Hold: Flat Earth Theory

Part of a series of posts of ideological turing tests.

I had originally intended this post to be first in the series, as an illustration.  Then suddenly the existence of alien life was in the news, so I went with that one.  But I already had this written, so figured I'd post it.

Ideological Turing Test

It is plainly obvious from immediate observation that the world is flat.  This is the position we all start with, and have to be brainwashed out of.  But I need to be clear about exactly what a "flat Earth" means.

Firstly, "flat" doesn't mean smooth like glass -- there are mountains, hills, valleys, etc.  That's quite apparent.  Flat here is more describing the earth's topology, that the Earth does not wrap back around itself.  A flat sheet of paper, and one that has been crinkled or crumpled up, are topologically identical.

Many people think that by a flat Earth we mean that the world is shaped like the Mercator projection map your school teacher used to put up.  Then it's easy to make the argument, flight times from Main to France are much much shorter than flight times from Panama to Senegal.  Whether you measure it in time, in distance, or in fuel expended, it's always more from Panama to Senegal, than Maine to France.  

Obviously this wouldn't make sense if the Earth were shaped like the Mercator projection.  But that doesn't mean the Earth isn't flat.  It just means the Earth isn't shaped like the Mercator projection.

The necessity of teaching better programming practice to physics PhDs

I am a numerical physicist.  I graduated a little over a year ago, and have since gone through the process of applying and interviewing for jobs.  This topic -- what can I do after I graduate -- has been a concern for me for well over a decade, and I've put a lot of thought into how to make sure I get the most out of my time as a graduate student.

I was fortunate, in that my advisor also had a lot of this in mind and had me use many standard best practices, such as git and building from makefiles, testing code output, and allowed me to work in C++ instead of Fortran.  But not all grad students are this fortunate.

I decided to write out some of my thoughts.  As written, this is directed at advisors, but is obviously applicable to grad students in planning how to do their research.  If you are a student, consider the advice here, and bring it up with your advisor.

Why we must change focus

To put it bluntly, Professor of Physics is no longer a job.

Shaggydog Theory, part II: George RR Martin really does not want to write A Song of Ice and Fire

Recently I was at the grocery store.  I live in the southeast, and this was some small local grocery store chain that only exists in my state, and largely only has locations in rural areas.  I was buying something late at night, don't remember which, when I ran across this Bargain Bin for books.  They were up to 80% off!

Of course, this isn't much excitement, as grocery stores pretty much exclusively sell crappy books no one would want to read.  The kind of book often reviled as an airplane novel.  The kind of book that still had some sort of purpose in the era before they wired up wifi into the last remaining place on earth where humans couldn't stare at their phones all day, but that now serves basically no purpose.

And this is what I saw inside the bin: